This week I was asked to sing the Katy Perry song "Unconditionally" for an upcoming inspirational service. It got me thinking about the first time I was asked to sing it... two years ago in honor of Valentine's Day. I had never heard the song before, and I remember thinking, "Me? Sing a Katy Perry song?" But as soon as I listened to it, I knew it was mine to sing. Thank you, Universe.
You see, I was single at the time... unattached... un-partnered... whatever you want to call it. ;-) Being on my own a good number of my adult years, I had gotten pretty good at the independent life. I figured since I couldn't seem to find anyone I truly clicked with, I would make the very most of my life as a happily single person. Just as I was starting to "resign" myself and accept what I thought was my destiny, I was asked to sing this song about intimate, unconditional love between two people. BAM. That's when it hit me. I had sort of been in denial. I had basically given up wanting what I truly wanted deep down. Perhaps I believed that since I had turned away perfectly lovely people along my journey I didn't deserve to be with anyone... or that the soul mate I desired just didn't exist.
As I listened to "Unconditionally" over and over again and began to embody the song, I could feel it slowly start to break my heart open. I began coming to terms with, and uncovering a deep longing that I had sort of hidden away. A longing to truly give my heart to someone... to share myself and my life fully... and to love someone unconditionally... specifically, in an intimate relationship. And tears began to flow. Tears of both joy and pain. I knew it was time to finally give myself permission to want what I wanted. To really open myself to it. To be vulnerable. And to get clear about my heart's desires in a partner. I realized that for it to exist "out there", it had to exist in my own being... in my own heart... in my own knowing. I had to believe that it existed. That he existed. I had to "get ready".
You see, I was single at the time... unattached... un-partnered... whatever you want to call it. ;-) Being on my own a good number of my adult years, I had gotten pretty good at the independent life. I figured since I couldn't seem to find anyone I truly clicked with, I would make the very most of my life as a happily single person. Just as I was starting to "resign" myself and accept what I thought was my destiny, I was asked to sing this song about intimate, unconditional love between two people. BAM. That's when it hit me. I had sort of been in denial. I had basically given up wanting what I truly wanted deep down. Perhaps I believed that since I had turned away perfectly lovely people along my journey I didn't deserve to be with anyone... or that the soul mate I desired just didn't exist.
As I listened to "Unconditionally" over and over again and began to embody the song, I could feel it slowly start to break my heart open. I began coming to terms with, and uncovering a deep longing that I had sort of hidden away. A longing to truly give my heart to someone... to share myself and my life fully... and to love someone unconditionally... specifically, in an intimate relationship. And tears began to flow. Tears of both joy and pain. I knew it was time to finally give myself permission to want what I wanted. To really open myself to it. To be vulnerable. And to get clear about my heart's desires in a partner. I realized that for it to exist "out there", it had to exist in my own being... in my own heart... in my own knowing. I had to believe that it existed. That he existed. I had to "get ready".
So, as much as I never thought I'd sing a Katy Perry song ;-) I have to say, it really got to me... and I sang it that Sunday with all my heart and soul. And... guess who was sitting in the front row that morning? Yep. My soul mate, Eric. :-) Turns out he was "getting ready", too. And little did we know that just a few weeks from that morning we would have our first official date. As we would later discover, we were both doing the "prep work" for our relationship. Making room. Getting clear.
Eric and I "meet" each other and connect on so many levels... most importantly, we have the desire and willingness to love each other unconditionally. It's not always rosy... and certainly not perfect... but it's real, it's beautiful, and it's what my heart has always desired. The unconditional love we share is something that grows every day. And we learn from it and from each other. Constantly. Along with the attraction and chemistry (which I do believe just has to be there... one of those things I had all but given up on), it is a choice to love unconditionally. And God keeps growing us in that department. And I am so thankful for that.
February is the month of love. I celebrate love every day, but this month in particular, I have been celebrating the intimate, soulmate love that came into my life two years ago. Reminding myself to never take it for granted. I am deeply grateful for the rich rewards and the way it has grown my heart to love in all capacities.
Believe in LOVE. Always. Pure, beautiful, unconditional love... in all its forms. Love is absolutely our greatest ally in this world. And... it does exist. <3
February is the month of love. I celebrate love every day, but this month in particular, I have been celebrating the intimate, soulmate love that came into my life two years ago. Reminding myself to never take it for granted. I am deeply grateful for the rich rewards and the way it has grown my heart to love in all capacities.
Believe in LOVE. Always. Pure, beautiful, unconditional love... in all its forms. Love is absolutely our greatest ally in this world. And... it does exist. <3
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